Jill's Stories

As you well know, I named you after your Uncle Jack, who was in the Army in Vietnam during the time of your birth. Little did I know then, of how your courage matched his own courage. I know it now. I am so touched by your strength and will power to get things done.

Jackie, you have raised three wonderful sons who exemplify your moral code. It does not go unnoticed that you were instrumental in the seamless moving about that our family accomplished through the years. You had attended four different high schools as we moved from state to state for employment purposes. You never complained. You just did what it took to get it done.

I am remembering, as I most often due these days, that your were born on Memorial Day almost 50 years ago. As a little girl, you marched in parades to celebrate the 4th of July, Memorial Day Parade etc. Your smile was so infectious and beautiful.

I am thinking of how you had the courage to return to college and study, and study very hard to achieve your goal of becoming a surgical tech, and at the same time raising the boys alone. You raised the bar for all of us.

What most people comment about you is your wonderful attitude and your chuckles and laughter because you have a great sense of humor. You seem to look beyond the difficulties and find fun wherever life takes you. You have the unique talent of letting things go where they will, pick it up and go on.

I am remembering how close you were to your Grandfather, Pappa and to your Grandmother, Mamma. I remember a particular event when someone in your high school tried to hurt you and Susan came to your rescue, and then Mamma and Pappa drove down from Cincinnati to make sure you were alright. You have been through some things. You always rose above it. How many other Mothers could have handled the deployment of their Son to Irac and carry on with so many responsibilities?

I look to you so often for help with decision making and advice. How is that, that a young woman can be so far ahead of her Mom in those respects? I think it is your birth right. Being first-born, you had to learn the lessons of life early on. Thank you for taking me along with you on the journey.

You have some more adventures awaiting you. I will have much joy watching all of your achievements and the empathy you extend to your family and medical associates. You are amazing!

Love, Mom

I am remembering the day that Susan entered into the world. After laboring for many hours, I awakened to hear that our beautiful baby girl was just born. I named this little one, Susan after my Great Grandmother, Suzanne Baumgartner, the mother of my Grandmother, Katy Murphy. Grandma Baumgartner was a remarkable woman as were so many of the women in our family. Unfortunately, she had maccular degeneration and became blind. She would move from home to home for her adult children to take turns watching over her. When I was lucky enough to visit her at my Grandmother’s house, I would sit at her feet and look up into her face. She loved children and welcomed any little people to come sit with her. She was able to do her own hand laundry and would wash her handkerchief and place it on her head to dry. Pretty amazing. She had unique qualities of resilience, fortitude and kindness.

When Susan was very young, she also visited her Great Grandmother’s house. Great-great Grandmother had already passed. Susan seemed to float around the house as if she belonged there; she spent lots of time in the yard and gave nuts to the squirrels. She seemed to know that part of her heritage lived there in that place on earth. There is a feeling that I was aware that Susan was a reflection of her Great Great Grandmother, Suzanne. Of note, little Susan was also in her Great Grandmother’s house when Mom Murphy (as we called her) passed away at 93 years of age.

I have a story that I would like to tell. When Susan was 2 years old, we lived in an apartment in Cincinnati. We loved to go to the outdoor pool. Susan was very curious and had been walking since she was 10 months old. She was very tiny and everyone could not take their eyes off this beautiful toddler. Without notice, she jumped into the pool at the deep end which was six feet deep. She could not swim. I could not swim either. I jumped into the water and grabbed Susan and held her above my head. My height is only 5 feet, so you can imagine where my head was. A young man saw us struggling and he jumped in and helped us to get to the side of the pool and lifted us up and out to safety. My only thought was to save Susan. I saw the water all around us. But I stood still under the water to hold Susan above the water. I am so grateful that someone was there to lift us up and out.

As I mentioned, the women in our family have some very unique qualities of resilience, fortitude and kindness coupled with an exquisite cognitive brilliance, hidden but always available. It seems that I captured some of the crystal ball intuition and named this precious child perfectly.

Susan, I am speaking to you now, through my writings, to praise your own resilience and your unstoppable drive to change the world and always do the right thing, even when no one is watching. You have gently continued the generations that your Great Grandmothers began for you. It is not unnoticed, that you appeared on this earth at a momentous time, well-equipped for success and fulfillment and a luminous directive for all of us. Thank you, Suz.

Love, Mom

I am thinking of two years ago when five beautiful people, five loving children, took the time out of their busy schedules to celebrate my 70th birthday. If you are wondering why it took me almost two years to write, you should know that I always meant to write about my gratitude and heart felt thanks. Considering the events of this past year, I believe it is time to write before time is up. That sounds so dramatic. Time is only a subjective measurement. There will always be “time” to do things, but since I am watching the terrible events in Washington D. C. with the failed attempt at insurrection and simultaneously watching the terrible and fatal corona virus infections spreading across the nation and the world, I realize that my small voice can whisper.

Now I know how important that special day really is. Jackie, first born, organized the surprise for all of her siblings to meet at our house on the Sunday after my birthday . She selected the date, a week after my birth date, to create a surprise for me. She also learned that Mary Jane would be in Knoxville at that time to attend a friend’s wedding. I understand that Michael purchased airline tickets to fly into Knoxville for the celebration. So two children flew in from Seattle. Jackie drove 10 hours from Pennsylvania and surprised me on Sunday morning. Susan organized her schedule to arrive at the house at the same time. I am not sure how she did that! Erich was overseas in Greece for business and changed his return to trip to add to the surprise. And Fred, unbeknownst to me, kept the secret. Every once in a while he would ask about Mary Jane’s arrival time in Knoxville. He would ask me if i had talked to Mike. I had told everyone that i didn’t require anything special on this year’s birthday. Isn’t that funny!

The following is a description of how it all happened on that day. Jackie drove to Knoxville with birthday surprises. Mary Jane was there with Susan; we were laughing and talking. After taking some photos, I turned around and couldn’t believe my eyes! Michael was standing in the family room smiling. I realized then, why Jackie wanted to wait a while to take some photos, She was waiting for Michael to get here. Truly magical!

I was so happy, I cried tears of joy, and felt like I was in a wonderful dream world. Michael spent the night at the house. We spent time talking and laughing and then driving to the breakfast party they had planned. When I walked into the First Watch Restaurant, I could hardly believe what I was seeing: All five children, Will and Susan, Erich and Shannon, Michael, Jackie, Mary Jane. We stayed a long while. It was so fun for all of us.

My most precious people. Part of me. Part of all of us. The bond that is everlasting. As Michael so poetically tells me: “We are all one, like waves in the ocean.” My interpretation is like the waves coming and going, splashing and lifting up, gently rolling in and out with the tide of life.

Grateful heart, indeed. Thank you, each of you for giving me purpose, giving me worth. For so long I’ve been chasing that dream. The dream is coming true.

Love you all,

Mom